Hey babes, welcome back! As you may have seen in my last post, my boyfriend came to visit me from America however a few days ago he had to leave. If you know anything about me, you know I’m emotional so I suppose it’s fair to assume I have been an emotional wreck ever since.
And then she knew that you could become homesick for people too
As much as I love spreading love, positivity and happiness, sometimes life isn’t always all butterflies and unicorns and I can’t just sit and pretend that those feeling don’t exist, so I’ve decided to embrace them as part of the experience and write about it.
I would love to jump straight to writing down my thoughts, however without a background this probably won’t make sense, so here’s a brief overview:
As you might or might not know, my boyfriend and I met on vacation two summers ago and have been in a long distance relationship ever since. We have been seeing each other semi-annually but recently as we’re older and more independent, we have started to see each other quarterly.
I was having a conversation with my friend/co-worker last week and she very wisely told me this and it seriously stuck with me. “You can spend every second of every day together, and it’s never enough”. Anyone in a long distance relationship understands this in a way unimaginable by people who have not experienced it.
Anyways, back to the story. This time was his turn to come visit as I was there for the Christmas break, so he came during his break and lived with me for two weeks. Now, although two weeks may seem like a long time, when you only see each other a total of like two months of the year, non consecutively, two weeks is nothing. However, we know that it’s a lot better than what other people get and we never fail to use up our time in the most efficient way.
Obviously the two weeks flew by with the blink of an eye, but I guess I have learned that over the last four times we have met so that didn’t surprise me much. What did surprise me, however, was the fact that the goodbye sucked just as much as all the other times, if not worse. I would have thought that after all this practice, I would be a little better at knowing how to deal with it, but if we’re being real this doesn’t even make logical sense. I mean, the more time you spend in a relationship, the more you get to know each other, the more you bond, the more memories are built and of course the more difficult it becomes to say good-bye to them.
I guess my biggest mistake would be underestimating the feeling of ultimate sadness and loneliness that always follows the moments after our separation. I assumed it would be easier this time, so that’s where I went wrong.
In the two weeks we spent together, a lot of things happened. More so emotionally than physically. Realistically, there is only so much you can get done in 14 days. I mean, just a 6 hour sleep schedule per night takes up a solid 1/4 of the time. Add school and work to the equation, and ta-da time flies by.
A lot of the things we did included cooking and going to class and doing homework together however when you’re with people you love, even the most boring things become fun. Emotionally however, which is the more important half of the experience, we bonded on a new level. His company slowly shifted from feeling like the one of a boyfriend, more towards the one of a family member, and that obviously changed things for me.
The entire experience just changed the game for me. I guess that’s the saddest part. If I were to spent time with him and find out we’re not meant to be, then things would be a lot simpler. However when every hour you spend with each other makes it more and more obvious that you’re meant to be together, that’s when things get tough.
How do you look someone you love in the eyes, kiss them and then watch them walk away from you?
Thanks for reading, hope you enjoyed
Until next time,